


lunch break

by sal1nesolut1on



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Cheese, Crack Fic, DSMP, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Joke Fic, Masturbation, Other, Prison, Smut, cheese as a fleshlight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:54:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29186622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sal1nesolut1on/pseuds/sal1nesolut1on
Summary: Sam, desperate and lonely on prison guard duty, fucks his favorite cheese.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	lunch break

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: uwu cheese is just too hot make sure not to cum while reading uwu (actual disclaimer: Please read the tags before continuing on with the story. Also, there is no cheese kink involved here. This is meant as a joke so take it with a grain of salt.)

Finally on his lunch break, Sam sat down in his usual spot in one of the corners of the prison, happy to get some well deserved rest.

This job was exhausting, lonely, and on top of that he was incredibly hungry. At the end of each day, his soul left his body the second he got home and fell down into the sweet comfort of his bed; That’s how draining this job really was.

With a sigh of relief, he opened his bag in which he carried his essentials, taking out his adorable little green box he kept his lunch in. On top of it, it had the face of a creeper. He had it since he was a child, so it always brought back happy memories.

Happy memories of the times when he didn’t have to worry about a thing.

He opened the box with a blissful smile, almost salivating over the sight before him, bouncing up and down on his chair from the pure joy he was experiencing.

It was a beautiful and crispy ham sandwich with some of his favorite cheese on the side; and he looked at it like it was the only thing in the world. You could almost see the hearts in his eyes.

Sam fucking loved cheese. 

He took the sandwich out and started eating it, almost moaning in between his bites from how good it was. He was over the moon.

He then looked at the remaining item in the box. 

The cheese.

The swiss cheese.

That hot ass fucking piece of cheese.

You know, the one with the holes in it?

Yeah, that one.

After a few moments of deep thoughts, he acknowledged what was really going on in his head.

The desperation has finally hit him; and it hit him like a truck.

He wanted it, and he wanted it now.

Sam took the piece of cheese, widening the hole enough for his dick to fit in. He looked around, making sure all was clear, quietly pulling his pants down slightly, so he could pull them back up in case of emergency; The type of emergency he would have no idea how to explain.

Just before entering the cheesy hole, he stopped himself and briefly questioned his decisions.

Why was he doing this again?

Huh.

Well, being this far along, fuck it. Not like he had anything better to do anyway.

I mean, what was a lone man on prison guard duty supposed to do with his free time anyway?

Taking one last deep breath, he closed his eyes, finally sticking his dick in his beloved swiss cheese. He groaned at the sensation, the cheese feeling better than expected.

It was soft, almost feeling like real human touch.

Or maybe he was just too touch-starved.

Most likely the latter.

Either way, putting his strange thoughts aside, he began thrusting into the hole, hips bucking up naturally from the pleasure.

He couldn’t contain his sounds very well, letting out small whimpers and moans here and there, so he clasped a hand over his mouth, hoping no-one can hear a damn thing. 

This couldn’t make him lose his job, could it?

Well, the cheese was just too fucking good.

He leaned back in the chair he was sitting on, throwing his head back and resting it on the wall behind him, imagining something much nicer than cheese in his head.

“Fuck”, Sam let out a quiet string of curses, his chest feeling heavier and heavier as he was getting closer to release.

With one last thrust, he came into the cheese.

He held onto it tight, his hips and legs shaking.

That was one hell of a lunch break.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, I am very sorry for this. I swear this is the last crack fic im writing. Probably. 
> 
> ANYWAYS THANK U FOR READING!!
> 
> And a big thank you to moose for the help and support <3


End file.
